Mona Kishnani Johnson
2 min readSep 13, 2022


Are you a Conscious or an Unconscious Example?

My daughter has a habit of saying “but still” after each sentence. It is particularly annoying when I am trying to teach her. It feels very contradicting. I got it to her attention.

One night my husband was reading Aesop’s fables to her about The Two Crabs. “My dear”. Called out an Old Crab to her daughter one day, “why do you sidle along in that awkward manner? Why don’t you go forward like other people?”. “Well, mother, “answered the young Crab, “it seems to me that I go exactly like you do. Go first and show me how, and I will gladly.” It was then it was brought to our conscious attention that both my husband and I were using “but still”, and were not even conscious of it. I wondered how much of our unconscious behavior our daughter was observing?

For better or worse, your children are mirrors. Your children reflect back to you your positive and negative behaviors because children learn what they live. You will be taught how to use your children’s less than perfect behavior as a way of viewing your own unconscious negative beliefs. The term “mirroring” means to see the external world as a mirror that reflects back to you the aspects of yourself that are emotionally difficult for you to see directly. When you use your children as mirrors, they will give you an instant, ongoing reflection of your own inner Self.

Children Are Mirrors

I’d rather watch a winner than hear one anyway

So please my loving parents, let your life show me the way

Because I am but a mirror of how you live today.

I might misunderstand you and the high advice you give

But there is no misunderstanding how you act and how you live

So my loving parents I can only mirror what you actively live.

Dennis Waitley

It is therefore important to create a relationship with your child based on highest degree of truth and integrity, so that your children feel safe enough to be emotionally honest with you and their siblings. Emotional honesty binds the family and creates a strong sense of trust. The more time that you invest in developing a loving, consciously awakened, spiritual relationship with your child, the better your child will be to fulfill his or her purpose for living.

Would love to hear your thoughts or experiences. “Ancora Imparo”.

Are you a conscious or unconscious example?